Thursday, April 20, 2006

Not_Just_Yet

Written for those who have experienced impossible love:

Not Just Yet...

Until the early hours of the morning,
I sit here at my window,
Watching the silent streets,thinking of you, of us.....
It has been such a hard lesson to learn,
That the once in a lifetime love is not a myth,
That such a love given, is not always returned,
That reality does not matter to the heart, it wants what it wants.
And as I look up at the moonless sky,
The stars beginning to fade with the first light of the day,
I tell myself that it is perhaps time to put thoughts of you behind,
But my heart refuses –
Not just yet.

My hurt vanity stirs up anger when it finds me still,
Listening just for your phone call,
Looking, among the many emails received in a day,just for yours,
My feet, guiding the unwilling me, to those places where
I just might accidentally bump into you.
I tell myself that it is perhaps time to avoid those places,
But my heart refuses –
Not just yet.

And these dreams that are grounded in unreality;
You and me, working together, laughing, Going for long drives, talking about everything, Sometimes, just enjoying the comfortable silences,
You, smiling, as I patiently try to explain the Troilet,
You, vainly suppressing your laughter, while I glare back,
As you watch me using the cordless power drill,
Me, the confirmed vegetarian, urging you to let go Of the catch while we go fishing together,
You, hastily gulping down water
After the first mouthful of the spicy Indian lunch I prepared for you,
You and me, watching sci-fi together,Or bantering and playing scrabble after dinner,
Or traveling to India – to the deserts of Rajasthan
And the coconut lagoons of Kerala.......
I tell myself that it is perhaps time to put these dreams aside,
But my heart dreams on –
You come up behind me and hug me, your arms around my waist

And I glance back at you with shy smile.....Well.... dreams never hurt anybody,

I’ll put them aside.... some day...., but......
Not Just Yet..... Not Just Yet........

17 comments:

Priya_Satarkar said...

Hmm great one.. But Dreams dont always come true.. But hope sustains a person. not in reality but atleast in dreams one can get what one wants..

AJ ! Serendipity !!! said...

love ?
is there love ???
no think with the objectivity of a rock and then tell me ?

D'yer Mak'er said...

still memories huh?

passerby55 said...

@priya...

Hope is faith holding out its hand in the dark.

We all hope our dreams come true....let's have faith in them too, to make true

thankyou.

passerby55 said...

@ajay.

When you understand someone... truly understand someone...
you can't help but love them. Therefore... anyone in your life... ANYONE... who you feel less than love for... you have misunderstood.

Knowledge is gained by learning; trust by doubt; skill by practice; and love by love.

love never leaves behind footprints and fingerprints....it leaves heartprints!....can anyone study that?

thankyou.

passerby55 said...

@ D'yer Mak'er...

lol..getting over with them..not yet just!...but will...

thankyou

AJ ! Serendipity !!! said...

mm
i must think about that. maybe i am confused.if i find anything to contradictary i may comment later. But a convincing reply.
thanks for your perspective. LOl

Jim said...

i am soo happy to neet u
i am 55 too

Priya_Satarkar said...

Passerby55,
You have a beautiful heart, otherwise you would'nt have been able to answer things so well.. I really appreciate your thoughts and agree with you fully..

Its also said that "You don't feel anyone is PERFECT till you love them"
To know true love you need to think with your heart, open your eyes to see how much someone is loving you... till then you are in dark...you may lose out the light if you close your eyes and say there is darkness everywhere

passerby55 said...

@saby..

me too very happy to read your views in my comment box.

AH! Those chubby cheeks and interesting ears in your profile picture.....are U 55!!??!!
HAHA......cheers!!

Anonymous said...

hey,
why u write lik these,
did ur ink had onion syrup,ther
wher tears in my eyes,
so either dn't lik this or dn't use tht syrup.
I too,understand ur feeling pretty well,as me too heart broken,but i got it
stiched,why dn't U do the same.
but if u do tht,ppl lik me will nt cry,so better u keep it unstiched.

I wish ur dreams come true very soon,but as u say Imagination is the highest kite you can fly,
so better keep imagining till u reach the SUN.
I wnna say more,
but can't imagine or dream lik u,
U R Beautiful,ur thgt r very beautiful !!!
But i jus wnna stand by U,nd ur thgt forever .

Lil Mizfit said...

"not just yet..." i often find myself using these words when i see the world around me go dark.

BTW, i changed my template. visit me!

AJ ! Serendipity !!! said...

why no new post ???
im waiting :)

passerby55 said...

@ priya..

thankyou...very beautiful words
"You don't feel anyone is PERFECT till you love them"

God Bless You

passerby55 said...

@ Anonymous

Welcome to my blog world..

I couldn't stop smiling after reading your comment.

"ink had onion syrup"......haha...
U r amazing...

"But i jus wnna stand by U,nd ur thgt forever".
U too use onion syrup as ink.

"Kisse purane hee nahi cahhiye roone ke liye...
Naayee, tazaa hawa bhi roola deti hai...
pal bhar ke liye..."

thankyou...my friend!

passerby55 said...

@ mizfit...hi

You one Positive Girl, full of life and enthusiasm...I like ur spirits!

I will visit your blog....
thankyou...

passerby55 said...

@ ajay...

thankyou. check the new post. You are very encouraging.